Dammit Tom, I’m an engineer, not a rapper,
less comfy on a stage than with warp cores and antimatter.
But it’s today, so while I’m taking my turn,
call me Khan on the mic while I spit these ear worms.
Boo, on the holodeck, you’re brave as a Gorn,
but there’s nothing cuter than you watching TV with some popcorn.
You’re a great pilot; it’s an immutable fact,
but when you broke warp 10 you were a lizard when you came back!
Of course, nothing changes that bangwI’ SoH,
the real love of my life, my parmaqqaywI’ SoH!
From my Klingon Day of Honor to the Barge of the Dead,
you help me face all the demons that I have in my head.
You held me tight in deep space and actually meant it,
So from my heart to yours: happy birthday, Lieutenant!
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